My Name is Mayo

You’ll notice that this isn’t much of a review and that’s because, truth be told, My Name is Mayo isn’t much of a video game. In fact, I am going to refrain from using that label for the rest of this article.

The objective in this poorly done time sink is to control a dismembered hand and click on a jar of mayo.

That’s it.

There are no obstacles, you cannot be defeated and a sense of victory can only come from completing all of the bonus objectives. (Though you can choose to continue to click well after that, if for some reason you want to)

I am honestly not even sure why you have the ability to move the cursor as there is no difference on where you click on the jar to get credit for it. Honestly, movement only allows for the chance to click on the background and force you to extend your time spent by one more press of the X button.

Let’s cut to the chase, if you bought this game, it was for the easy platinum.

You aren’t fooling anyone.

In order to obtain it, you can’t just press the X button 10 thousand times, that would be too simple.

What you actually have to do is press the X button 10 thousand times WHILE ALSO periodically opening the menu and changing the jars costume. That is the only deviation in this insult to actual developers everywhere.

They should have called the platinum “I could have bought a chocolate bar.” As when you are done with it you will have a lot less satisfaction, maybe even embarrassment, by having this trophy in your list rather than an empty candy bar wrapper.

For those looking to justify their purchase, I guess there are many worse ways to spend $1.50. In that case, kudos to the developer for finding a way to only take one step up from straight up selling a platinum off the store and making some money.

I know I usually start my reviews with graphics and sound but as I said this isn’t a review. Look at one of the screenshots. Not much more I can say than there.

Buy this only if you have an extra $1.50 kicking around in your virtual wallet, have a half an hour to spare and do not care about how you gain your platinums.

~~Sandro Luketic~~

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